


Gotham Laser Tag Palace

by EndoratheWitch



Series: Gotham Nights [27]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Batman: The Animated Series, Harley Quinn (Comics), Suicide Squad (2016)
Genre: Cheating, Clowns, Cussing, Drug Use, F/M, Joker and Harley in a loving relationship, Laser Tag, Lawyers, Murder, Semi-Public Sex, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:20:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22444717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EndoratheWitch/pseuds/EndoratheWitch
Summary: Harley thinks playing laser tag with some of the gang will be a good bonding experience.
Relationships: Joker (DCU)/Harleen Quinzel
Series: Gotham Nights [27]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/551110
Comments: 4
Kudos: 24





	Gotham Laser Tag Palace

The outside of the large, refurbished warehouse had a neon sign that flashed in red and green over the door announcing the name of the place as: “Gotham Laser Tag Palace.” Underneath in smaller red letters the sign read cheerfully: “Your number one place for fun.” Several people were leaving, and no line of people were waiting to enter since the place would be closing in an hour. Harley noticed that several children, as well as some teens, that were leaving the place looked pretty upset or were actually crying. She frowned, wondering why on earth they looked so upset. 

Joker muttered under his breath, adjusting the collar of the fur coat he wore over his pin-stripped purple slacks with bright green suspenders and a purple dress shirt. He had decided against a tie or jacket because of where they were going, but he had kept his black dress shoes on because they were super comfortable. As usual, his lips were painted red, the smile extending past his lips to form a wide smile up to his cheekbones. 

“We’ll see about that.” He frowned while glaring at the sign and leaning on his cane, his dark purple leather gloves creaking with the movement of his fingers. 

Harley gave him a hard nudge in the ribs, causing Joker to grunt. “Puddin, now stop that. This is going to be fun and it will be building bonds to strengthen the gang,” she said with a smile and a nod of her head. Her blonde pigtails were curled and bouncing under the red beret she had worn this evening, matching the red fur coat she wore over her red and black leggings, black army boots and the cute little red top with long sleeves. Joker particularly liked the top. It was tight--showing off her breasts--and stopped just under her breasts showing off a nice inch of bare stomach (plus he thought she might not be wearing a bra because of how prominent her nipples pushed against the fabric.) 

Joker wrinkled his nose under his wide brimmed purple hat. “I don’t see why just simply going out and killing a bunch of people won’t achieve the same effect.” 

Harley narrowed her eyes at him. “No, because that’s usually only fun for us puddin and we don’t need to strengthen our bonds,” she added with a smile playing at her lips as she reached up and brushed her finger along the Joker's red painted bottom lip. 

Joker smirked at her, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close. The sunglasses he was wearing (even though it was evening) were round with the purple lenses; it slid to the tip of his long nose as he gazed over them at her, his dazzling blue eyes filled with mirth and something far more erotic. “I enjoy strengthening my bonds with you as much as possible pumpkin, for long hours of steady, hard strengthening.” He pressed another hand to her rear and thrust his pelvis against hers. Harley giggled, wrapping her arms around his neck. “You are so bad.” 

Joker waggled his eyebrows. “You like it.” 

Harley giggled stretching up on her toes, her lips hovering within an inch of his nicely painted red ones. “I do like it when you’re bad puddin.” She pressed her lips against his and Joker purred, pulling her closer. 

Frost glanced back at the Boss and Miss Quinn with a sigh and a slight smile. They were both in a good mood tonight, so that should make this fun. Miss Quinn had decided a couple of nights ago that the gang needed some more team building exercises, especially after the robbery fiasco last week where two members of the gang got their wires crossed and had screwed up, which had ended with Joker gassing them both. Since then morale had been a little low (not because anyone was particularly sad about the deaths of the two gang members, but because Harley had been disappointed in the gang members and no one liked Harley being disappointed. She had been walking around with a frown on her pretty face, which upset Joker, which led to more gassing or gunshots. Either way the mood of the gang was down, but Miss Quinn had come up with this idea--laser tag--to encourage some team building and to wash away the mood. She maintained that it would cheer the gang up, especially Joker who was always Harley’s number one focus.) 

Frost walked up to the ticket booth with Bob beside him. Tonight the big man was dressed in all purple and green, Joker’s colors. His green and purple tutu sparkled in the neon light from the laser tag sign as Bob stood grinning beside Frost. It was clear the large bald man was happy about tonight’s events. “Ah…” Frost turned and made a quick head count. “Eleven tickets please.” The woman in the ticket booth lifted a brow, looking Frost over, taking in his black suit, but she didn’t bat an eye at Bob’s ensemble. “You know we’re only open another hour, doors close at midnight. We close whether your game is done or not.” 

Frost nodded. “I know.” 

She shrugged and took his money before printing out the tickets. “Have fun.” 

Frost turned, holding up the tickets. “Okay Boss, ready to go.” 

Joker sighed taking Harley’s hand and walking toward Frost, who held the door open. “This would be a lot more fun if we could use real guns.” 

Harley smiled. “It’ll be fun puddin--I promise!” 

Joker sighed. “I suppose.” 

Behind them, two men in clown makeup and overalls walked nearly shoulder to shoulder. One of them wore a red clown wig, the other a green one. 

The one in the red clown wig, named Chuckles, whispered to Bingo. “You think Mr. J has a gun on him?” 

The one in the green wig, Bingo, shrugged. “Probably, but I bet he’s got a few knives on him too.” 

Chuckles nodded. “Yeah, you’re probably right.” He snickered. “This might actually be fun.” 

Bingo nodded his agreement. “Yeah, better than super soaker night because we’ll be playing against other people instead of each other.” 

Chuckles smirked. “Yeah, if Joker gets pissed, it’ll probably be at some norm and not us.” 

Bingo grinned. “We can only hope, but at least we got that new guy Jordan with us and that Kalley chick. Things go south, throw the newbies under the bus.” 

Chuckles nodded sagely. “Amen brother, amen.” 

* 

The eleven of them were in one of the waiting rooms hanging up their coats and pulling on their laser tag vests, all of them decorated with purple neon. Joker slid the vest over his shoulders and began adjusting his straps while the man on the television located near the ceiling where no one could touch the set, was going over the rules. 

“No pushing or other physical violence, no bad language and no climbing structures; these will all get your team eliminated without a refund.” 

Joker turned to glare at the set. “I still can’t believe we actually paid money to get in here.” 

Harley adjusted her left vest strap, trying to be careful since the laser gun was attached to the vest and kept bumping against her knee. “Oh puddin, stop griping. It’s going to be fun, I promise and later we can do something else fun.” Harley winked at him. 

Joker brightened asking eagerly. “Dance of the wonder weasel?” 

Harley giggled stepping in close to him, though the laser tag vests prevented them from getting too close. “If you’re good,” she purred, stroking a finger along his cheek. 

Joker held a hand up like he was making the scout’s pledge. “You have my word sweets, I’ll be as good as gold.” Behind his back, which everyone else in the room saw, Joker had the fingers to his other hand crossed. 

* 

The inside of the laser tag warehouse was mostly pitch black, a two-story maze with loud techno music playing, along with fog from a fog machine to obscure the floor and occasionally jet puffs of fog higher into the arena. Harley looked around with squinted eyes. The only light in the place came from the laser lights of the guns, the lights on the vests, and the UV lights in green and blue that highlighted walls and structures in an attempt to stop people from crashing into them, even though running wasn’t allowed. It was difficult to see with only the UV providing any light and the vapors from the fog machine obscuring even that. This was going to be fun, she thought. She was glad they had waited this near to closing time too--that way the gang could enjoy the game without tripping over any kids either. 

Harley was really proud of herself for coming up with this idea! Even Joker now seemed to be getting into the spirit of things. Harleen turned to face her lover with a wide smile. 

Joker grinned, turning to face their gang. “All right boys and girls, remember: we are the Jesters.” He held up his plastic laser gun. “Our opponents are a team calling themselves The Noob Slayers. I hate them already.” 

Harley frowned. “Noob Slayers? What kind of asshole name is that?” 

Joker smirked. “The kind that is going to have their asses handed to them by the Jesters, that’s who! All right, everyone get in there and make your Uncle Joker proud!” 

Joker grinned at Harley. “You, my sweet, are with me.” 

Harley giggled. “Come on puddin--let’s go!” 

Frost glanced at Bob who eagerly smiled, and the two men headed off together. 

Not far behind Frost and Bob, Chuckles glanced at Bingo. “Come on buddy.” 

“Sure thing!” Bingo grinned and the two men headed out into the darkness. 

Poppy, her usually purple hair dyed half blue, half green, asked Chris who had just finished taking a large gulp from his flask of gin before hiding the small silver object back on his person. 

“Shouldn’t some of us like, find and watch the base?” 

Chris looked confused. Even in the pale light, Poppy could see that his eyes were bloodshot, but he nodded. “Good idea, come on.” He staggered into the maze with Poppy following. 

Baggy just looked at the remaining gang members, grunted, and wandered into the dark maze. 

Jordan, his sandy blonde hair looking a bit greasy, and with weasel-like features, pulled back his lips into an eager grin. “I’m going to win this!” 

Kalley, a woman in clown makeup, complete with red rubber nose and long, orange dyed hair frowned at him. “This is about the team winning Jordan, not just you.” 

Jordan snorted at her. “It’s always about me! If I can get the most kills for our team, Mr. Joker will notice me!” 

Kalley muttered under her breath. “I don’t know if that is such a good idea.” 

“Whaddya mean? Of course getting noticed is a good idea!” Jordan protested with a look that said Kalley didn’t know what she was talking about, but Kalley shook her head. “You know, maybe trying to get more points than Joker isn’t…” 

Jordan laughed. “Don’t be stupid Kalley!” 

Kalley narrowed her eyes at him. “Fine, whatever.” She turned and walked off, but Jordan grinned. “Good, I don’t need you anyway.” He turned and headed in the other direction. 

* 

The Noob Slayers consisted of seven men and two women, all seriously competitive laser tag players ranging in age from twenty-five to thirty-five. They all worked for the same law company, Miller and Sons, and ranged from pre-law intern students to lawyers, with one of them working in stocks. Every Friday night their group came to play laser tag and every Friday night they dominated the scene, eliminating children and adults alike with savage glee. 

Their group’s leader Keith Snyder--who looked like he could have been actor Jon Hamm’s brother--grinned as he addressed their team. 

“We got one last group guys. Some last minute noobs just joined.” He sneered before taking a hit off the joint he had in his hand and passed it off. “This is gonna be great.” 

Dustin, one of the interns, a toe-headed young man with a nasty smile, laughed and took the joint for Keith. He took a long hit and passed it along. “I love squashing noobs before going out for drinks.” 

The other members laughed in agreement, each of them taking a hit off the joint before it made its way back to Keith, who put it out and slipped it into the front pocket of his dress shirt. “Yeah, their name showed up. They’re calling themselves the Jesters.” 

Karen, a brunette lawyer with the perfect bob of hair and the currently accepted fit body of someone who hit the gym every day, laughed after she sprinkled some white powder on the side of her hand and sniffed it up quickly before tossing the packet of white powder to Cheryl, her girlfriend. “The Jesters? What the fuck kind of stupid name is that? Let’s go eliminate them.” 

“Sounds good.” Cheryl sneered and sniffed a few times, white powder staining her upper lip as she tossed the packet to Brody, a tall handsome man who made her think of Daniel Craig--which was why she was having an affair with him. 

Keith nodded. “I want Ricardo and Lewis to guard the base--the rest of you divide and conquer!” 

The group screamed like a hunting party of vikings before rushing into the dark maze. 

* 

Martin yawned. He was supposed to be watching over the players, but it was the last hour of the night, and it had been a long Friday night. The Noob Slayers, as usual, had destroyed every team that played against them which had ended with crying kids, angry parents, pissed off teenagers, and an assortment of other angry players of all ages. And lots and lots of yelling, death threats, and even some kid throwing up on his shoes. He, Debbie, and Mario had been caught in the middle all evening, again. He hated Friday nights when those assholes showed up. They ruined the fun for everyone. 

The last group to come in for the evening looked a bit weird, a Joker and Harley-wannabe (He had seen lots of those over his time here, but these two were some of the best. If he didn’t know better, he would say they were the real thing.) Their friends had been a mixed barrel of weird from the guy in the suit to the big dude in a tutu and the clowns, but he knew the Noob Slayers would win; that team cheated as well as being complete assholes. Management did nothing about them either, because not only did the Noob Slayers pay in cash every Friday night, they were a group of lawyers from one of Gotham’s biggest law firms The management was terrified of them. 

So all of the employees had to put up with the Noob Slayers or get fired. 

Martin, and every other employee of Gotham Laser Tag Palace, thought that this group of lawyers and their interns were the lowest of the low in Gotham--a bunch of slimy, ambulance chasing, drugged up, alcoholic pricks. He hoped every night someone would show up to take them down. 

But he figured tonight probably wasn't the night. The Noob Slayers were smoking pot and sniffing cocaine. Those slimeballs were probably going to wipe the floor with the Jesters since he was pretty sure they were new to the whole laser tag thing in general. 

But Martin and the others didn't have to stand around and watch, so the three of them stepped outside to have a smoke. It was only an hour until closing...they could get through it. 

* 

The first match was a train wreck. 

The Jesters struggled through the first twenty minute match, mostly because it was their first time playing laser tag and everyone was trying to figure out the maze and the obstacles. It didn’t help matters that the Noob Slayers were relentless jerks. Not only had the attorneys mocked them the entire time, calling them names and just acting like sore winners in general, but one of them had elbowed Bob in the side. 

Their group was now at their “base” waiting for the second game to begin. Frost had his arm around Bob’s shoulder while the large man sniffed, big, fat crocodile tears in his eyes. 

Harley hurried over and wrapped her arms around Bob. “Oh Bob, my big boy, did they hurt you?” 

Bob frowned and nodded, leaning into her hug. The rest of the gang muttered among themselves, everyone embarrassed and annoyed by their loss with only Joker, Harley, Frost, and Jordan having made any points for their team. 

Joker looked furious at the rest of them. “I can’t believe we all sucked so badly!! We’re criminals! We shoot other people for a living!!” 

Bingo raised his hand and Joker pointed at him to speak. “Well, in our defense Boss, when we shoot people, sometimes just a nick will put them down. You have to actually hit, hit them in this game and...well this place is...a maze.” 

Jordan added with the air of someone clearly trying to make sure everyone knew how good he was. “Well, I scored five of our points…” 

Joker pursed his lips together, his blue eyes flashed, clearly still annoyed, but Harley intervened, breaking into Jordan's self-promotion. “Bingo’s right puddin. When we shoot someone for real, you only have to nick them to put them down and this requires you to be a better shot…” 

Joker muttered. “Fine, but after this everyone needs to take some shooting lessons from Frost.” 

Harley smiled at him, hopping up to plant a kiss on Joker’s cheek. He grinned at her calming down before he addressed his gang again. 

“All right people, this was our test run. This time I expect you to get in there and slaughter them or be slaughtered later--because I’ll be really pissed off otherwise!!” 

The gang cheered, working themselves up for the idea of victory over their opponents. 

Harley pulled Joker aside and hissed next to his ear. “Puddin, that really isn’t very team building you know?” 

Joker gave her a winning smile, his teeth sparkling in the UV light. “Of course it is pumpkin pie! Everyone is motivated to not piss me off.” He tilted his head slightly at her, continuing to smile. 

Harley frowned in thought, then shrugged. “Well, I suppose that’s true puddin.” 

Joker pulled her close before walking her back up against a wall. He pressed his body against hers as best he could with the laser vests. He laid his forehead against hers, his hands resting gently against her throat, his thumbs stroking her jaw. The devilish look in his eyes made Harley giggle. 

“How about you and I find ourselves a nice little place to discuss our own motivation?” Joker purred rubbing his long nose against hers. “I need motivation to not kill anyone.” He caressed her lips with his as he hissed. “Or at least a distraction…” 

Harley giggled again, her hands reaching down between them to cup his groin. Joker groaned, his eyes fluttering for a moment. She gently massaged him, enjoying the feel of her puddin in her hand. “I think a little distraction would be good puddin, it’ll let the team work to please you while I’m pleasing you. It’s a very good idea,” she said with an air of authority. 

Joker chuckled “Mm...I do love when you put on your doctor voice Harley.” 

Harley laughed and grabbed his hand, pulling him into the darkness, looking for a place where she could practice her physician’s authority over him. 

* 

Keith grinned and laughed. “God those fucking Jesters are worse than I thought!” 

Adien, Keith’s assistant, laughed. “Did you see the freak with the green hair?” 

Keith nodded taking a hit from Karen’s cocaine stash. “Fuck, he must be one of those Joker groupies.” 

Karen snorted on a laugh, taking a hit off the Keith’s joint. “And that bitch with him trying to look like Harley Quinn, fucking pathetic. Some people are really pathetic.” She shook her head, passing the joint to Ricardo who took a deep inhale off the joint, letting the smoke out slowly after he had held it for a few seconds. “The guy in the suit is the real weirdo I think. He looked so tense, though him and his boyfriend in the tutu looked like they might have handled guns before…” He coughed and handed the joint to Lance, the newest member of their little group (after Alan had gotten himself fired for misconduct, stupid bastard Ricardo thought.) 

Lance frowned. “You don’t think they might be…” 

Keith snorted. “Oh come on Lance, serious? Why the fuck would Joker and Harley be here?” 

Lance licked his lips, taking a hit off the joint after Dustin gave him a hard jab in the side. “I don’t know, they do weird things...don’t they?” 

Cheryl wrinkled her nose, sniffing a little after the hit of cocaine. “He isn’t wrong. You hear about that incident at the coffee shop? I mean it was a while back...and then there was something about a laundromat…” 

Keith snatched the joint from Brody and snarled, “Oh such the fuck up, the lot of you. Becoming a bunch of pussies because some assholes show up looking like clowns? Fuck ‘em. Besides, they can’t play for shit. Now let’s get out there and crush them!” 

The group cheered. 

* 

Bob and Frost found themselves a little tower that barely held alone, but they made it work, both of them watching and waiting. 

Frost grinned and whispered to Bob. “I see two of them.” 

Bob silently chuckled and took aim. 

* 

Jordan elbowed Kalley, causing the young woman to gasp as he shoved her out of the way and took several shots, catching two of the Noob Slayers. 

Kalley snarled. “Fuck Jordan, I was going to shoot them!” 

Jordan grinned at her. “You snooze, you lose Kalley. Don’t hate the player, hate the game.” 

Kalley glared at him and turned to leave Jordan; he could play by himself. “Don’t hate the player, hate the game.” She muttered, “I don’t, I hate the asshole.” 

* 

Harley found a corner that was nearly completely dark; only one or two blue UV lights cast any light in the corner. She dragged Joker into the small space and shoved him against the wall. Joker made a soft grunt when his back hit the wall. She smiled wickedly at him and unbuckled his vest, yanked it off, and dropped it to the floor before she did the same with her vest. Once both the vests were on the floor, Harley threw herself against him, her mouth attacking his, her tongue sliding against his red lips. 

Joker grinned with pleasure, grasped her rear, and pulled her against his body, opening his mouth to her. His tongue hungrily twisted with hers, the game momentarily forgotten. 

Harley groaned, one hand reaching up to his hair where she grabbed a fistful, holding his head while she devoured his mouth. She lifted one leg, pressed her foot against the wall. 

Joker slid his hands along the space where her top didn’t meet her pants, and slid his hands up under the top. 

He smirked at her and whispered, “I thought you weren’t wearing a bra Harley.” 

Harley giggled in response, which turned to a groan when he gently grasped her breast with one hand. Joker squeezed gently before his thumb teased her nipple, moved slowly back and forth against the hard, sensitive nipple that sent a tickle of intense pleasure that shot straight to her groin and made her clitoris throb. 

Harley made a sound that caused his groin to tighten. He loved the little sounds she made. 

Harley dropped her leg before falling to her knees. Joker pressed his back against the wall, his breath soft and shallow as he watched her. Harley’s fingers worked quickly at his belt, unbuckling it, then unsnapping his suspenders before she pulled his pants down. Joker chuckled, gazing down at her. His gloved fingers played with her pigtails while Harley worked his erection free. She kissed his stomach, dragging her nose against his pale skin before she wet her lips with her tongue, the sight of which sent a shiver through him. Harley’s gaze shifted from his erection to his blue eyes. 

She kept eye contact while she stuck her tongue out and slowly--holding him so she could start at the base of his erection--dragged her tongue up his length. 

Joker sucked his bottom lip, breathing deeply as a warm shudder moved through him, sparked by the touch of her tongue. She licked him again, slowly, before taking the head of his erection into her mouth and slowly wrapping her warm, soft lips around, just the head of his penis. She sucked once, then gently dragged her teeth along the tender, satin skin before sucking again, slow and soft. 

Joker groaned, dropping his hands from her hair to press them against the wall. The blue UV lights made her skin (and his white flesh) glow. Harley smiled at him and gradually lowered her mouth further, taking him into her mouth until he was touching the back of her throat. Her tongue moved in a slow, wet back and forth motion against the underside of his erection. 

Joker’s eyes rolled as a warm tickle spread over him from where his erection was being sucked, then up through his center and spread out like a fan, exciting every nerve ending in his body, and making his knees weak. 

Harley smiled around him in her mouth. She loved sucking on him, loved how soft and warm his skin felt, how his erection pulsed with heat. She glanced up at him, enjoying the expression of pleasure on his face. One of his green curls had fallen against his forehead, his lips red, his mouth partly open. When he sucked in his bottom lip, Harley’s groin ached, blood rushing to her groin and to her breasts making them feel heavy. Her nipples pressed against her top and every sensation was amplified. She lowered her mouth on him, relaxing her jaw to take all of him into her mouth. She firmly pressed her lips against him and dragged them along his erection. 

Joker groaned loudly, reaching down to caress her face. At the same time his hips jerked with the pleasure of her mouth pulling on him. 

Harley smiled, tasting his excitement with a low moan of pleasure in the back of her throat. 

* 

Baggy shot two of the Noob Slayers then grinned at Chris who gave the big man a thumbs up and turned to Poppy. “You get anyone yet?” 

She smirked. “Yeah, some bitch who looks high as fuck. What about you?” 

Chris shrugged. “I got someone…” He looked down at the display on the back of his laser gun. “At least my gun says I did…” 

Poppy shook her head, then her gaze snapped around to the left. “I saw movement--come on!” She grabbed Chris and dragged him with her. 

* 

Bingo and Chuckles were laughing, having nailed three guys from the other team. Now that Joker had lit a fire under their butts, both clowns were taking the game more seriously. Plus getting used to how the game and the lasers worked made playing easier. 

Chuckles grinned at his pal. “Okay, now I’m having fun!” 

Bingo grinned. “You see how pissed those last two were?!” 

Chuckles nodded, giggling, then put a finger to his mouth. He pointed and both men looked to see two people from the other team creeping along. Chuckles pointed at the two other players then motioned to one before pointing at himself then the other he gestured to Bingo. Bingo nodded and the two clowns crept after the two Noob Slayers. 

* 

Joker yanked Harley’s leggings down, then pulled her boot off to pull the leggings off one of her legs completely. He didn’t bother with the other, but simply lifted her now free leg up over his shoulder where he sat on his knees and pressed her back against his wall. He buried his mouth against her sex with a groan. It was a little awkward with his pants around his ankles, but he was skilled at working in awkward situations. 

Harley gasped, burying her fingers in green hair, her eyes sliding nearly closed. She gazed down at him, feeling a shudder of pleasure, not just from feeling the warm, slick caress of his tongue, but seeing his green-haired head between her legs added to the pleasure. She moaned as Joker licked her, his tongue playing over her clitoris in circling motions. He paid close attention to the sensitive bud, glancing up at her, his blue eyes dancing. She could feel the smile on his lips against her sex, evoking a shudder through her. 

Joker purred and hummed against her clitoris, sending little ripples through her before he gently slid two fingers into her. He ran his gloved hands up over her flat stomach while he sucked. 

Harley gasped, jerking, her head falling back against the wall while he fucked her with his gloved fingers, continuing to suck on her clitoris, alternating with licks and flicks with his tongue. Joker grinned while he worked on her, enjoying the delicious sounds of pleasure she made, mixed with the heady taste and scent of her surrounding him. He groaned against her clitoris again as he 

thrust his fingers deep inside Harley. He hissed with pleasure when he felt her tighten around his fingers, jerking against them. He responded by tugging on her clitoris with his lips and Harley howled in delighted response. 

Joker giggled, pleased with himself when he tasted the rush of fluid from her. He opened his mouth wider, taking thorough, deep licks, sucking on her to taste every bit of her orgasm. 

He purred against her. “Delicious Harley…” 

She cried out again and tilted her head back against the wall, digging her fingers into his green hair. 

* 

Frost chuckled. Now that he and Bob had found a good position, they were sniping Noob Slayers like shooting fish in a barrel. 

Bob silently laughed and Frost could feel the big man’s happy movements each time he made a shot. 

* 

Keith grabbed Dustin and shoved the younger man against the wall. “What the fuck is going on? We’re losing!! We never lose!!” 

Dustin shrugged. “I guess they figured out how to play.” 

Keith snarled, letting Dustin go. “Fuck!!! Where are the others?” 

Dustin thought for a moment. “Not sure, I think Ricardo switched with Lewis and is in the game instead of at the base, but that was after a couple of them--some young guy and a girl with clown hair took the base out...” 

“WHAT? We lost our base!! What is wrong with everyone!!” Keith shoved Dustin out of the way. “This isn’t happening!!” 

* 

Joker got to his feet, grabbing Harley and kissing her deeply, his arms wrapped around her. Harley groaned in pleasure, her hands wrapping around to grab his bare ass and spreading her fingers to grasp him firmly. She dug her nails in slightly, causing him to jerk a little toward her with a muffled chuckle. Harley purred. She could taste herself on his mouth which only excited her more. She caught his bottom lip with her teeth and tugged gently, her eyes bright as she gazed back at him. 

Joker grinned at her, twisted his tongue with hers in an explicit, erotic dance when she released his bottom lip. He pulled back just a little, the tips of their tongues flicking and caressing slowly, amusement and lust in their eyes. He brushed his nose against hers before diving his tongue back into her mouth, his hands moving up and under her top again, his glove-covered hands cupping her breasts, thumbs pressing against the nipples of both breasts before he gave her a light pinch on each nipple. Harley jerked with a lust-filled hiss. 

Joker pulled away, his breathing heavy as he grinned at her. Harley noticed the smear of his red lipstick across his lips, which only intensified her attraction; she loved smearing his lipstick. 

Joker whispered low. “I’m going to fuck you, Harley. I want to feel that sweet pussy of yours tight around me...” 

Harley shivered. She loved when he talked dirty to her, especially since he didn’t do it often. She slowly stroked his rear with the tips of his nails, dragging her fingers up to his lower back. “Do it puddin, I wanna feel you cum hard inside me...” 

Joker’s smile made her heart beat hard and fast. She let out a little yelp as instead of responding to her, he spun her around and she caught herself against the wall with her hands. Joker kicked one of his feet free from his slacks (the shoe made it difficult, but he managed it), then he used his foot to spread her legs wider. 

Harley smiled over her shoulder at him, arching her hips out to him and rising up on her tiptoes. 

Joker licked his lips, one hand caressing her rear, gazing with lustful greed at her exposed, dripping sex while the UV lights danced over her skin and made her glow inticingly. His girl, he thought, his and only his… 

Joker groaned softly, grasping his erection with one hand, his other hand on her hip. He took a few seconds to coat the head of his erection in her fluids, sucking on his bottom lip in pleasure at the slick, wet feel of her before he eased himself into her, groaning as he slid inside of her, every inch of him feeling the exquisite, warm and slippery feel of his girl. 

“Tell me how much you want me,” he hissed against her ear. “Tell me you want me to fuck you.” 

Harley jerked, her fingers pressing into the wall, her eyes rolling with pleasure as he push inside her, burying himself as deep as he could into her. She tightened around him with a loud groan of pleasure. “Uh...puddin. Please fuck me...make me cum, please...” she begged him softly. 

Joker grasped her hips and leaned close to run his tongue over her ear with a groan. “Harley…” 

Harley leaned her head back, turning to put her hand against his cheek, kissing him, their tongues playing against one another before Joker thrust into her. She gasped and dropped her hand back to the wall while Joker held her hips, thrusting hard into her--quick, deep movements that made her cry out loud, “Puddin!!” 

Joker chucked and hissed. “I love fucking you Harley--you’re so wet.” 

Harley couldn’t respond. She was focused on feeling him slamming into her and using the wall to hold herself up. She pressed her upper teeth into her bottom lip, loving the sound of him slapping against her backside. Even with the loud music playing, she could hear the wet sound of his erection moving in and out of her, his hips slapping against her rear. 

Harley felt the felt ripple of an orgasm roll over her and she cried out, arching her back, her cry turning into a squeal of pleasure. 

Joker groaned watching her, feeling her tighten around him. His knees felt weak for a moment, but he held back...not yet. 

* 

Jordan grinned, holding his gun out so that Poppy and Chris could see his score. “Told ya, I bet I have the best fucking score! I bet I even bested Joker’s score.” 

Poppy made a face. “Well that isn’t hard dipshit. I passed the Boss and Harley in a corner fucking. They’re not even playing right now.” 

Chris nodded, taking a sip from his flask. “If the Boss and Harley were playing right now, they would fucking wipe the floor with you moron, and if you did do better than him or his girl, you think the Boss wouldn’t shoot you for being such a shit about it?” 

Jordan frowned as if he was having a hard time processing the fact that someone might be upset with him. 

* 

Harley screamed. She couldn’t stop herself, Joker was so deep inside her and he had reached around to rub his gloved fingers against her clitoris while he made his quick hard thrusts. She felt as if she was going to collapse, he felt so good. He pressed his weight against her, his other hand snaking under her top to grasp her breast. He held her nipple between two fingers while he brushed his forefinger against her nipple. 

Harley whimpered, squeezing him tight inside her as another orgasm began to build only to burst like a bomb when Joker’s voice, deep and erotic, whispered against her ear. “Cum for me pumpkin, let Daddy hear you again.” 

She had no choice but to obey him. 

* 

Karen snarled throwing her hands up in the air. “Oh fuck me!! Again!!!” 

Cheryl was laughing at her girlfriend. “Geez Karen, not doing too well tonight.” 

“Oh shut up Cheryl, you don’t have to be such a fucking bitch,” Karen snarled at her and stomped away only to hear the two clowns that had shot her snickering at her back. 

* 

Harley was pressed against the wall, her knees threatening to give out. She felt relaxed, as if every bone in her body had turned to liquid, but at the same time her puddin’s thrusts continued to stimulate, making her gasp and groan. Joker grasped her hips with both hands, thrusting hard and fast into her. She could feel the building tension in him, his erection hard and ready to burst. 

She moaned, turning to look over her shoulder at him. “Yes puddin, harder…” 

Joker looked at her, his smiled wide, and thrust hard. She felt his body jerk and he cried out with a deep groan, letting himself burst into her with a complete loss of control. He kept thrusting, his erection pulsating as he expelled himself into Harley who shuddered, gasping with pleasure. 

* 

Frost looked around. The second game had just ended with the Jesters winning. Everyone had gathered at the base, but the Boss and Miss Quinn were still missing. He frowned in thought before he turned to look at the gang. 

“Anybody see the Boss and Miss Quinn?” 

Kalley raised her hand. “Ah, Frost sir, they were in a corner…” 

Frost looked at her as Kalley blushed a bright red that was visible even in the weird UV lights. “What?” It took him a couple of beats before he slowly said. “Oh…” 

“That’s right Frost! Harley and I were boinking in the corner like a couple of horny teenagers!! It was fabulous!” Joker laughed, walking into the area that was designated as the Jester’s base for the game with his arm around Harley’s waist. “Best sort of laser tag,” Joker announced while Harley giggled. “Boink, boink, boink!” 

Joker stopped, smiling at his gang. “Okay, so…” 

“We won Boss,” Frost announced. 

Harley squealed and clapped her hands. “All right!! I knew you guys could do it!” 

Jordan called out. “I had the third highest score!” 

“Nobody cares Jordan,” Poppy snarled, though Joker ignored them both. 

“Now we just have one more to win!!” Joker laughed. “Ah, do we win anything?” He turned to look at Harley who shrugged. “Well we get tickets to use at the gift shop.” 

Joker gasped bringing his hands up to his face. “Really? Perfect!!” He grinned at his gang. “Okay guys, let's win those tickets!! Your Uncle Joker wants a glow in the dark yoyo!” 

* 

Keith growled. “How did we fucking lose???!!! The Noob Slayers NEVER LOSE!” he screamed at everyone. 

Karen winced and glared at him. “Fuck off Keith, you lost too. It wasn’t just us, so shut the fuck up with the yelling.” 

Keith glared at her before he put his hand out. Karen sighed and reached into the pocket of her slacks and pulled out a little plastic bag that was filled with an assortment of pills of varying shapes and colors. She dropped the bag into Keith’s hand. He opened it and pulled out a couple of pills not really looking to see what he pulled out and popped them into his mouth before passing the drugs around. 

“All right, all right fine--we all fucked up.” He took a steadying breath. “We have one more game and we need to win this so our record stays perfect.” Keith ran his fingers through his short hair. 

Brody grinned. “I brought the electrical tape and the strobelights...you know, just in case.” 

Keith’s head snapped over to Brody. “You did?” 

Brody nodded. “I mean, I know we haven’t had to cheat in months, but you never know…” 

Keith grinned. “Brody, that’s why you got the promotion and Karen didn’t.” 

Karen made a face and gave Keith her middle finger. “Oh shut up, Keith. He got it because he was willing to suck your dick when I wasn’t.” 

Keith ignored her, grabbing the roll of tape and the plastic bag filled with tiny strobe lights normally used for bicyclists and joggers from Brody. “All right guys, we are going to win this one. Let’s tape up those sensors.” 

* 

The last round had started, and Joker grinned in the darkness, creeping along next to Harley. “I feel much more relaxed now,” he said, giving her a sidelong grin. 

Harley giggled looking around. “Me too.” 

They both shared an intimate laugh and continued to move slowly, keeping down and looking for someone to shoot. 

That was when there was a shout and a flurry of cursing followed by the sound of running feet. Joker grabbed Harley, yanking her with him behind a couple of barrels. They both heard the footsteps coming closer. Joker rose up slowly, his laser gun ready… 

But it was Bingo. 

Bingo spun around when he heard movement. He was breathing hard, but he rushed over to them and ducked behind the barrel on Joker’s other side. “Boss! They’re cheating!” 

Joker frowned, lowering himself back down while Harley put a finger to her lips and hissed at Bingo. “Shhh!” 

Joker narrowed his eyes. “What do you mean they’re cheating?” 

Bingo took a deep breath. “Chuckles and I saw two of them before they saw us, but they had this weird strobe light going on them that made it hard for us to see. Anyway, we fired at them, but it was weird. I mean, I know even with the strobe light we should have hit them, but nothing happened. They turned and got us and Chuckles got pissed. He got closer to them and said they had black tape over some of their sensor lights, on their vests, you know…” 

Harley frowned. “Strobe lights?” 

Joker shared a look with her. “Tape?” 

“I hate cheaters,” Harley growled. 

Joker frowned followed by a sigh. “Especially when we decided to play by the rules. You know Harls? I continue to lose faith in the human race. Cheating at laser tag...how low can you go?” 

Harley nodded her understanding. “So, what should we do puddin?” 

Joker lifted a brow at her and asked softly. “Think it’s time to play the game like I would play it pumpkin?” 

Harley grinned. “You know puddin, I think you’re right, killing people together is a great bonding experience.” 

Joker laughed and turned his attention to Bingo. “Tell everyone to meet back at the base.” 

Bingo nodded and hurried off. 

Joker turned his attention back to Harley. “So, what do you have on you my dear?” 

Harley grinned. “I’ve got a gun and a baton.” 

Joker frowned, remembering his hands all over her just a few minutes ago. “Where did you have a gun on you?” 

Harley giggled. “That’s for me to know and for you to search for my body and find out.” 

Joker giggled lifting amused eyebrows at her. “I love you Harls.” 

Harley kissed his cheek. “I love you too puddin.” 

* 

Back at the base, Joker looked around, meeting everyone’s gaze. “Okay boys and girls. It has come to my attention that the other team, the Noob Slayers, are cheating.” 

This was greeted by several mutters. 

Joker grinned. “So now I’ve decided we are going to play the game like I think it should be played. As the saying goes, cheaters never prosper. Well, I say we teach them this lesson in the most deadly fashion possible. Everyone with me? Not that you have a choice, but I do like to give the illusion of this being a democracy.” He smiled brightly. 

The gang cheered. 

Joker laughed. “All right, let’s take a survey on what real weapons everyone has.” 

Baggy raised his hand. “I have a tomahawk.” 

Everyone turned to stare at the tall clown who pulled a small axe from seemingly nowhere. 

Bingo whispered to Chuckles. “Is calling it a tomahawk racist?” 

Chuckles frowned looking at Baggy who was well over six feet tall and built like a brick wall. “You gonna tell him that?” 

Bingo frowned and shook his head. “Ah, nope.” 

* 

Joker ended up having two pistols on him, as well as two knives and his cane--after sending Frost to retrieve it from the waiting room where their coats were hanging. Harley had a gun and a baton, Frost had his gun, Bob had a small gun that looked like a toy in his large hand. Baggy had his axe, Bingo and Chuckles each had a gun, Kalley had a hammer, Poppy (with Bob’s help) was able to break a piece of bent metal free from one of the structures to use as a bat. Chris got a piece of wood with nails at one end (broken off one of the barrels in the game by Bob) and lastly Jordan… 

Jordan frowned, looking at everyone. “But I want a gun.” 

Joker clenched his jaw. Jordan had been trying to get Frost to give him his gun, reasoning that he was a better shot than Frost. 

Harley could sense that Joker was about ready to shoot Jordan in the face, so she stepped in. “Jordan, Frost is not going to give you his gun.” 

Jordan frowned. “What about Jo…” 

Harley cut him off as Joker’s head snapped around to glare at Jordan. “Why don’t you just use the plastic laser gun? You can beat someone with that, can’t you. Bob will even break it free from the vest for you.” 

Jordan looked at everyone, then at the plastic laser gun. Harley waited to see if self-preservation was stronger than Jordan’s stupidity and was pleasantly surprised when Jordan sighed. “Yeah, okay.” 

Harley grinned hurrying back to Joker as Bob walked over to Jordan and easily broke the gun free from the vest. 

Joker smiled. “Well boys and girls, get out there and win one for the Gipper. Oh, and Bob, could you head over to the control room and put on some murder music?” 

Bob smiled brightly, giving Joker a salute before he disappeared. 

Joker grinned, then sighed as he looked over his gang. “Well, what are you waiting for? Get out there and kill the competition!” 

* 

The sounds of Megadeth singing “These Boots were Made for Walking” began to pump through the laser tag maze. 

Joker didn’t have either gun out or his knives, but he was swinging his cane happily as he walked beside Harley, occasion tapping the metal tip against the floor. “You think I should have given that dipshit Jordan one of my guns Harls? I find I’m more in the mood for beating the Noob Slayers...” Joker said the other team's name with a level of annoyance that made Harley smile. “...bloody mood instead of shooting them.” 

Harley wrinkled her nose. “Nah, if he can’t learn to kill someone with what he’s got, then he isn’t worth having in the gang.” 

Joker nodded. “You know sweets, that’s very true.” He kissed her cheek. “You are always so smart.” 

Harley grinned happily. “Well, I am a doctor.” 

Joker laughed. “That is very true--the best doctor in Arkham!” 

He stopped and used his cane to hook Harley at the waist and pull her closer. Harley giggled as she came up against his chest. She wrapped her arms around his neck, smiling as she gazed into his blue eyes. “When we go home, how about a warm bubble bath, some cookies, milk, and some snuggling?” she asked, brushing her lips against his freshly lipsticked red lips, the smile extending beyond his lips into a wide smile that always gave her goosebumps. 

Joker purred, brushing his long nose against hers, his tongue flicking out to lick her lips. “Mm...that sounds delightful pumpkin, but maybe we can add some boinking in there too?” he asked with a lifted brow and hopeful smile. 

Harley giggled “I love doing some boinking with my puddin, you insatiable clown.” 

Joker laughed before covering her mouth in a deep kiss, his arms tight around her. 

* 

Somewhere close by, Keith stopped and looked up into the darkness as Dave Mustaine sang about his boots. “What the fuck? Who changed the music?” 

Karen frowned, glancing toward Brody who shrugged. She made a sour face at him and turned her attention back to Keith. “Maybe the Jesters got the attendant to change the music.” 

Keith muttered. “Fuckers. I hate these Jesters!” He stomped his foot which caused Karen to snicker while he hissed. “Okay, spread out!” He glared at Karen and Brody. “Lance and Ricardo said they saw two of them a few minutes ago, the rest can’t be far behind. I want us to slaughter them…We are not leaving here without winning!” 

Karen shrugged, then asked with a wicked grin. “Can we play dirty?” 

Keith smiled, his teeth shining oddly in the UV light. “Whatever it takes Karen. Whatever it takes.” 

* 

Frost headed to the tower where he had Bob had been sniping players during the last game. His gun wasn’t really good for sniping, but he figured he would still get off several good shots from there and besides, he and Bob were going to meet there as soon as Bob was done in the control booth. 

No sooner had he gotten into his spot, looking out into the fog covered dark maze, than he spied Bob in the fog, dashing at a speed and with a grace that didn’t go with the tutu wearing man’s bulky size. Frost saw other movement, a strobe light not far behind Bob. Frost frowned. Those fuckers were cheating! 

He took aim at the strobe light… 

* 

Dustin grinned. The big freak in the tutu was right in front of him. He was going to kick the man in the back of the legs, knock him flat, then take the shot, hitting the man’s laser vest in the back. And he was going to hurt the tutu wearing freak. Win-win. 

Dustin was almost close enough to get the freak when he heard a distinctive, loud popping sound. At the same time Dustin’s strobe light that he had attached to his collar exploded in a tiny shower of plastic that sent little shards of plastic cutting across his cheeks as well as something wet. 

Dustin stopped moving, blinking in surprise. He looked down to see a bloody hole in his shoulder where his strobe light had been, then another popping sound followed. Dustin jerked in response as another hole appear in the middle of his chest. He frowned, completely confused, reaching up to touch the bloody hole before his knees folded and he fell to the floor. 

* 

John was the lowest guy in the hierarchy of the Noob Slayers. He had just been invited to join the office laser tag group this last week after Dennis got himself fired when he was caught doing cocaine in the office lunch room. John had been so excited by the promotion and he was enjoying himself. Between the drugs, the sex with Karen in the bathroom between matches, and the fact that he was one of the group now, he was having a ball. 

He moved quickly, thought he heard movement not too far ahead of him. He could probably catch whoever it was and blast them easily... 

John hurried around one of the makeshift towers, his laser gun up and ready when something whizzed through the air and struck him in the forehead with a meaty thunk that made John stagger back a few steps. John’s eyes crossed, and for only a brief second did his brain realize that he was seeing a wooden shaft in front of him before his brain completely shut down. 

Baggy came out of the fog with a wide grin, reaching down to pull his tomahawk free. 

* 

Adien came running out of the fog, slamming into Keith, his eyes were wide and dilated. He grabbed Keith by the straps of his laser tag vest. “KEITH!! I found Dustin!! Someone shot him!!!” 

Keith pushed Adien off of him. “What the fuck are you talking about??” 

“DUSTIN’S DEAD!!” Adien wailed. 

Karen sighed, glancing at Cheryl. While the rest had gone off alone, Karen, Cheryl, and Brody had all stuck with Keith--not on purpose, they just sort of gravitated to each other. Karen figured it was because they were sort of the leaders of their little group. Strength attracted strength, or more likely it was because they had all slept together at one point or another and there had been that orgy after the Christmas office party last year. Nah, she thought. Orgy wasn’t the right word...moresomes? She didn’t know, or care. 

Keith rolled his eyes at Aiden. “I told you not to mix the coke with ecstasy, it always makes you act stupid.” 

“You know, they say not to do drugs, kids.” 

The five of them turned around to see the green haired man with the blonde woman standing nearby, both of them smiling. The man had a cane over his shoulder as he leveled a wide smile at them. 

“You guys ever see those commercials with the egg and the frying pan? You know the one where they say: this is your brain on drugs?” He laughed. “I loved those commercials.” Keith and the others all turned and shot them with the laser guns, only to realize that neither person was wearing a laser tag vest. 

Joker laughed, glancing with amusement at Harley. “Oh look at them, they think we’re still playing the same game pumpkin.” 

Harley giggled. “Yeah, it’s cute.” 

Keith yelled. “Where the fuck are your vests??!” 

Joker stepped forward a little. Adien was the only one to back away, scurrying to hide behind Keith. “Well, you see….” Joker frowned. “I’m sorry, I don’t have your name.” 

Keith sucked on his teeth looking unhappy, but he sighed. “Keith, this is Karen, Cheryl, Brody, and Adien.” 

Harley wrinkled her nose at the lot of them. “Now those are some boring names.” 

Joker nodded. “Yep. Agreed.” 

Keith glared. “Who are you?” 

Joker laughed. “OH! I love this question!! Harley my precious, would you mind?” 

Harley grinned stepping past Joker a step. “I would love to puddin.” 

She smiled, throwing her arms into the air. “Introducing The Clown Prince of Crime, the Jest of Genocide, the Harlequin of Hate, the one, the only: JOKER!!” 

She bowed out of the way and Joker stepped forward, taking a bow. “Thank you, thank you! And let us not forget, the Princess of Crime, my Queen, my partner in all things, the beautiful and extremely hot Harley Quinn!” 

Harley giggled and curtsied. 

No one reacted for a beat until Keith whispered. “Are you fucking with me?” 

Joker wrinkled his nose. “I am indeed not ‘fucking with you.’ And...gross...I only fuck with Harley and then only in the very fun, wet way that involves a lot of tongues and some fingers.” 

Harley giggled, her eyes wide. “Puddin!” 

He grinned at her, waggling his eyebrows. 

Karen snarled. “That’s not funny, you fucking freak.” 

Joker smiled at her. “Well I don’t find it funny that you…” He motioned at the five of them with his cane. “Have decided to cheat. You know what’s worse than a murderer? A cheater.” 

Keith frowned. “I don’t think that’s right…” 

Joker cocked his hip as he leaned on his cane. “What are you, a lawyer?” 

Karen spoke up. “We’re all lawyers, you shithead.” 

Joker blinked turning a surprised expression on Harley. “You hear that sweets? They’re all lawyers.” 

Harley grimaced, as if she smelled and tasted something awful. “Ew.” 

“Well then, killing you lot is a public service! Batman can’t get mad at me about that!” Joker announced, but Harley shook her head. “Sorry puddin, he will. You know how Batsy is, he’s real strict about that law and order bullshit.” Harley shrugged. 

Joker groaned. “Well, fuck me.” 

“I plan on it,” Harley added quickly, which made him laugh. 

Keith shouted. “You are not the Joker! I don’t know who you two think you are…” 

Joker blinked at him. “We think we’re Joker and Harley. Who do you think you are?” 

Keith frowned. “Ah…” 

“Yeah that’s what I thought, a bunch of cheaters.” Joker sighed. “Well I’m tired of this conversation.” He picked up his cane, holding it like a bat. “You know how you can tell a lawyer is lying, their lips are moving. You know how you can tell a lawyer pissed off the Joker?” He asked with a smile, then stepped forward and swung his cane, the handle of which was curved and had Joker’s likeness on it. The metal handle caught Keith across the cheek, snapping his head to the side. 

Karen and Cheryl screamed in unison. Harley yanked her baton free, the hard plastic extending while she drew her gun with her other hand. Harley shot Cheryl, catching the woman with a perfect forehead shot. 

Adien screamed a high-pitched scream worthy of a horror movie as Cheryl fell down dead at his feet, a small spatter of blood covering his face. He didn’t move quickly enough before Harley was on him, her baton catching the man in the chest hard enough that she knocked the air out of his lungs and there was a loud cracking sound like something thick had broken. Harley smirked as Adien stumbled. She brought her baton up, catching him under the jaw with another loud crack, which she followed with a backhanded swing. The blunt weapon caught Adien across the cheek with loud sickening sounding crunch. The attorney was still on his feet--though barely--when Harley hit him again, hard enough that she cracked his eye socket. The man fell, his face a bloody mess as he sputtered incoherently and twitched on the floor. 

All of her actions happened so quickly that Karen and Brody didn’t react before Harley had turned her attention to Karen. 

Joker laughed, dancing back a few steps as Keith took a staggering step toward him, swinging his fists clumsily. Between the strike from Joker’s cane and the drugs in his system, Keith was having difficulties focusing. Brody rushed to help him, surprising Joker when he punched the clown in the cheek. 

Karen screamed at Harley. Instead of throwing a punch, the other woman tackled her, driving Harley to the floor. The two women struggled for a few seconds and Harley lost her baton, couldn’t quite reach her gun. Karen rolled, pinning Harley underneath her. She straddled the blonde and started to throw her fists down at her with a surprising amount of viciousness. A punch caught Harley in the mouth, splitting her lip, and another punch glanced against her cheek, though Harley was mostly able to block the blows. 

Harley brought her arms up blocking Karen’s blows, which were pretty strong for a lawyer, she thought. She wasn’t a slouch in a fight Harley thought with brief admiration before she used her weight to throw the other woman off of her. 

Harley landed between Karen’s legs, throwing a series of quick punches that landed, breaking Karen’s nose, bloodying her lips. Karen was screaming angrily reaching up to grab Harley’s pigtails and yanked her down, shifting her leg so that Harley’s forehead hit against Karen’s knee. She then shoved Harley off of her. 

Harley stumbled a little, but rose to her feet just as Karen stood too, coming at her again. 

* 

Joker tasted blood in his mouth, but he didn’t have time to contemplate the blood before Brody attacked him from one side, Keith from his other. Joker spun to face Brody first, swinging his cane over his head; the cane cracked against the top of Brody’s head. The man gasped in pain and stumbled back, dizzy from the blow. Joker kicked the younger man in the chest, then spun his cane, adjusting his grip to swing it at the other man in a one-handed attack, first from the right, catching Brody in the cheek, then back, knocking the younger man’s head the other way. 

Joker hooked the cane around the back of Brody’s neck spinning around and used the younger man, throwing him at Keith who was trying to grab Joker from behind. Brody slammed into Keith, both men becoming tangled in each other limbs for a second. 

Joker laughed as blood dripped down his chin. 

Keith shoved Brody at Joker, who slammed into Joker before the clown could stop him. Brody got lucky and grabbed Joker by the throat, driving the green-haired man back against the wall. He tried to punch Joker, but the clown adjusted his grip on the cane, shortening his hold and slammed the head of it up and under Brody’s jaw. He twisted the cane around with his fingers in a quick gesture which brought the hooked part up, facing Brody. Joker brought the cane up further and used the hooked end to dig into Brody’s cheek, ripped open the other man’s cheek with a swift move. 

Brody screamed and released his hold on Joker’s neck. 

Keith ran. 

Joker laughed, adjusting his hold again as Brody fell to the floor, walking over to stand over Brody. He used his cane to beat the man to death until there was nothing left of Brody’s head, but a bloody muss. 

* 

Harley grabbed Karen by the back of her neck and threw the other woman into one of the maze obstacles. Karen hit barrier full force with her face. She gasped and turned, grabbed Harley by her shoulders, both women stumbling. Harley saw that Karen’s face was bloody and her nose lay at a strange angle. The two women struggled for a moment, spinning around, but Harley brought her arms up together and snapped them to the sides to break the other woman’s hold on her. She snapped one fist out, hit Karen in the face with a hard right hook. She followed with another hit, right to Karen’s stomach. 

Karen stumbled and Harley turned, yelling with her hand out. “Puddin!!” 

Joker, his face and clothing covered in blood, turned to see Harley and grinned. He pulled one of his knives out with one hand and tossed it toward her. “Here ya go pumpkin!” 

Harley caught the knife by its handle, but Karen slugged her, catching Harley in the side of her brow. Harley stumbled, momentarily stunned, and the woman kneed her in the side. Harley gasped, but swung at her opponent, adjusting her hold on the knife and stabbed Karen in the chest, catching her between two ribs, the blade sliding into her lung. 

Karen gasped, suddenly having trouble breathing, but she hit Harley again, catching the blonde across her mouth. 

Harley gasped at the coppery taste of blood in her mouth again. She adjusted her hold on the knife and shoved the blade up and into Karen’s throat, the tip appearing in Karen’s mouth. She held it for a second as Karen stared at her with wide eyes. 

Harley’s smiled was vicious and bloody. “I hate lawyers,” she whispered before she yanked the knife free. 

* 

Joker had taken off after Keith at a brisk walk, laughing as he called out. “Oh, you can run darling, but I’ll catch up!! Haven’t you seen the slasher flicks?” He did a little skip dance as he moved, chuckling to himself. 

Keith was looking around frantically for a place to hide, but he could hear the Joker coming after him. His heart was beating so loud and he couldn’t think of anything except that this really was the Joker. 

“Yoohoo!!! Noob Slayer!! Where are you!!” 

Keith felt tears running down his cheeks and he choked back a whimper. This was not happening!! Keith stopped moving, had no idea where he was. There was so much fog and darkness, he couldn’t find a place to hide, and his mind raced...many drugs, he thought for a moment. 

“Oh there you are!!” 

Keith turned to see Joker standing only inches from him, a gun in his hand and the barrel pointed at Keith. 

Joker giggled. “Gotcha!” 

He pulled the trigger. Keith cringed, closing his eyes, but other than a clicking sound, nothing happened. He opened his eyes slowly to see a flag sticking out of the gun with the word “BANG” on it in a colorful explosion of color and a few flakes of confetti. 

Joker frowned. “Huh, well look at that. Wrong gun.” 

Keith started to laugh, but then abruptly stopped when Joker pulled out another gun. “And that is why I always bring a spare.” 

Joker’s laugh was the last thing Keith heard just before the gunshot. 

* 

Joker yawned, stretching his arms over his head, his lips and chin bloody, as well as staining his clothing. “Well, that was fun.” 

Harley, using her tongue to probe her slightly bloody and swollen lip, pulled his coat off the hanger and handed it to him. Joker smiled at her, slipping the coat on before picking up his hat and placing it on his head. 

“Made sure everyone was dead?” he asked Frost. 

Frost nodded. “Sure thing Boss. The only people alive are the three employees; the ticket lady had already left for the night. Bob and I just tied them up and left them in the main office. And we cleaned out the register too.” 

Joker grinned patting Frost and Bob both on the shoulders. “Good, good men, that’s why you two are my favorites.” 

(Jordan gave Frost and Bob a dirty look.) 

Bob smiled, pleased, and even Frost grinned. 

Joker hurried over to help Harley with her coat, picking up her beret and placing it gently on her head. He frowned as he looked at her bloody lip before he leaned in and very gently kissed her. 

Harley sighed happily and returned his kiss. 

Joker pulled her into his arms and whispered. “Still up for that bubble bath sweets?” 

“More than ever puddin,” she murmured back. 

He smiled and rubbed his nose against hers. “Good, though I had an idea: why don’t we make our own laser tag maze at the hideout?” 

Harley laughed. “I think that would be a great idea puddin.” 

Joker grinned at her, wrinkling his nose playfully. “I knew you would like it.” He sighed happily, keeping an arm around her waist. “Now, let’s go home. I have a bubble bath, some boinking and cookies in my future!”


End file.
